Team building travesty
by Thatkliqkid
Summary: Oneshot. Old fic I found, Shawn and Hunter get lost on a team building activity. General silliness ensues.


"Gummy worm?"

Hunter shot Shawn a look of utter disgust.

"We're out in sub-zero temperatures; half starving to death and all you offer me is _Gummy worms?"_

"Well yeah. You can't have the cookies"

"You come on a team building exercise for an entire weekend and your food supplies are Gummy worms and cookies? I'm sorry I was unaware my partner was eight"

"I did have sandwiches but I ate them on the coach" shrugged Shawn sheepishly

Hunter emitted a sigh of frustration

"Out of everyone why did I get stuck with you?"

"You chose me" grinned Shawn

"More fool me" muttered Hunter beneath his breath

"Hey don't get all huffy just because you're hungry, where's your own darn food supply huh?"

"You ate it!"

"I was nervous" wailed Shawn, "I eat when I get nervous"

"Nervous of _what_? Getting off the coach?"

"Yes Hunter, that was so it. The drop down steps had me all a kafuffle" Shawn rolled his eyes, "Actually it was the teamwork stuff"

"Ah yeah you're not very good at playing with other people" smirked Hunter

"Like you're so much better Mr. Politics"

"And who taught me the politics?" questioned Hunter

"That's irrelevant!" Shawn dismissed "Look we have to make it back to the greeting centre before 4pm or the bus vamooses on outta here leaving me and you stuck in Sherwood Forest"

"Sherwood Forest? What are you Robin Hood?"

"Shut up and read the map"

"Map? I have no map"

Shawn stopped, dead in his tracks and looked at his friend, oozing alarm.

"You're kidding right?"

"No, you took the map"

"I did not!"

"You did! You took my tuna sandwich and then I said if you wanted to empty my bag so bad you could take the thermos _and the map_"

"But I didn't take it" refuted Shawn, "I took the thermos and wrapped the map around it then-"

"Put it on the floor of the bus" finished Hunter with a groan, " I knew I should have partnered with Jericho"

"You hate Jericho; the internet sites told me so"

"At least I would have had a map!" roared Hunter, "Now what are we supposed to do?"

"We could wait here for a friendly deer to come along and guide us to safety"

Hunter glanced at Shawn, in awe of his stupidity.

"How about we just leave a trail of breadcrumbs?" he sneered, "Besides o' great gummy worm hoarder, since when were we in any danger?"

"Were you not listening before? If we're not back by 4pm they're _leaving_ us!"

"Vince won't leave us"

"He left us before!"

"Correction he left _you_ before and that was only because you threw a tantrum like a spoilt brat about how you had to sit next to Billy Gunn" snapped Hunter

"He wanted to play blue car, red car" whined Shawn, "And I wanted to sit with you"

"Why Shawnie I didn't know you cared" joked Hunter, "Now pick up your rucksack and move"

"Move where? Downhill? Uphill? Say Hunt, you memorise the map?" retorted Shawn his tone laced with sarcasm.

"You either walk down the hill or you roll, take your pick"

"Roll?"

"Would you prefer to bounce? If I push you hard you might"

" Ha ha very funny" grumbled Shawn fingering a gummy worm, he startled as Hunter rounded on him.

"Will you put those damn gummy worms AWAY!"

Shawn let out an indignant gasp as Hunter swatted at him sending the bag tumbling to the ground, jellied sweets splayed out in a multicoloured fan of waste

"Hey!!"

You're not going back for them"

"Hunter-"

"Will you just walk?"

"But you- OW! You're hurting me, let go!"

Hunter yanked him roughly down the beaten track as Shawn resisted.

"You've still got cookies!"

"I want the gummy worms!" replied Shawn stubbornly, "They're the sour kind"

"Yeah well now they're the mud covered kind" snapped Hunter equally as obstinate, "I swear if we miss the coach _you_ are giving me a piggy back all the way to Connecticut"

"I'm not carrying you, you ruined my candy"

"Oh suck it up and be a team member"

"What kind of team member are you? YOU WRECKED MY GUMMY WORMIES!"

Hunter cracked up laughing

"I'll get you some more as soon as we're out of the forest"

"Can I eat them on the coach?"

"Maybe not as soon as we get out of the forest" Hunter corrected himself. Shawn mumbled beneath his breath as he unwillingly trudged after his friend.

"You got a problem there camouflage cry-baby take it up with Vin Man when we get back"

"Alright I will!" retorted Shawn petulantly, "And don't make fun of my jacket! When we get attacked I'll blend in and you'll be killed"

They continued their walk in silence, Shawn dragging his feet several steps behind his friend.

"Hunter?" he questioned meekly

"Yes my whining buddy?"

"I don't think good team members walk miles in silence"

"Ok, wanna hear a rhyme?"

"Sure" shrugged Shawn

"Mary had a little lamb she also had a duck she put them on the fireplace to see if they would-"

"HUNTER!"

"What?! Mary was gonna see if they could dance!"

"She was not!" cried Shawn

"Oh I'm sorry did _you_ create the rhyme?"

"Did you?" countered Shawn

"Sheesh sometimes you get offended by the stupidest things"

"Sometimes you're a nimrod" murmured Shawn hitching his bag further onto his shoulder.

"Say you wouldn't have anything...I don't know...._useful_ in there would you?"

"I used to have some gummy worms" griped Shawn rummaging around in the bottom of his bag, "Until _somebody_-"

"WILL YOU SHUT UP ABOUT THE GUMMY WORMS? YOU'RE FORTY THREE!" interjected Hunter harshly, "Now where do you think the greeting centre is?"

"How should I know? I'm going senile in my old age" snapped Shawn stomping ahead, "I hope you get eaten by a bear!"

"Oh real mature!"

"A bear and a coyote!"

"Yeah? Well I hope a vulture comes for your cookies"

"Vultures don't eat cookies!"

"Oh so you know what does and doesn't eat cookies but you can't tell me if we have to go left or right?"

"I'm ambidextrous you jerk"

"I always thought you were annoying myself" mocked Hunter

"I think we go straight ahead" Shawn announced disregarding the jibe.

" Oh yeah and what are you basing this assumption on?"

"Footprints"

"Ohhh footprints, ever think they could be from some other idiot like you who forgot to bring a map so dragged his partner round_ in circles?"_

"Nope, they're heading back to the greeting centre" Shawn replied wilfully

"And you know this how?"

" fresh tracks"

" We're not hunting the greeting centre you do know this right?"

" Really? Thanks for pointing that out Hunter, I thought we were going to roast it on a spit" retorted Shawn sardonically.

" Are you sure this goes back to the greeting centre?"

" YES! Unless you have a bright idea on how to get there?"

" you got your cell phone?"

" No, left it on the bus"

" Did you just leave _everything_ on the fucking bus?" growled Hunter exasperatedly

" No I brought cookies"

" Oh no can't leave the precious cookies on the bus, they're too important. God knows they'll help us find the greeting centre better than a map or a cell phone"

" Where's your cell phone genius?"

" At home"

"Least _my_ cell phone's in the same state" countered Shawn smugly

" And it's being put to _so_ much use"

Shawn battled his way through the shrubbery, snickered evilly as a twig whipped backwards catching Hunter in the face.

" HA! Look!" he crowed excitedly pointing at the greeting centre looming before them, " Told 'ya it went right back"

Hunter shrugged unwilling to heap praise on the man who had bothered him for the best part of a day.

He clambered aboard the bus, his body steeped in fatigue more from Shawn's verbal barrage than the physical toll of the day.

" What did the DX boys learn about teamwork then?" joked Vince as Hunter slumped in his seat, Shawn leaned over the headrest

" Not to trust him with the map"

" Oh I meant to tell you" interjected Shawn, " I found the map"

" Where was it? Still wrapped around the thermos?"

" Nah, it was in the bottom of my bag"

" So you made us walk around in circles for four hours for NOTHING?!" bellowed Hunter

" Not nothing Hunt, we learned a valuable lesson"

" What?" groaned Hunter

" Never _ever _ tamper with your team mate's food supply" he smiled sweetly.


End file.
